Well, not quite all grown up, but she's definitely not so much of a baby any more.
She changed so much last week. I can't quite get my head around it yet. She is becoming so independent, yet she's also affectionate in a deliberate way {when it suits her, of course!}. She says 'I love you' {more like 'yuv you'} and 'No, Mama, don't! ' {with perfect pronunciation - can you guess which one she says more often?}. She tries very hard to dress herself. And insists on wearing sunglasses inside. She also has a tattoo. A temporary one. From the day she spent in childcare last week. And she has painted finger nails and toe nails. From when Daddy was baby-sitting and let her play with my make-up bag. She had her hair cut at a salon for the first time, after I butchered it and inadvertently gave her a mullet. She has started to sleep so much better. Which makes me very happy. She carefully selects and reads fives books before going to sleep each night. She recognizes when she's tired and asks to take an afternoon nap. She only eats very flavorful food...sushi, vietnamese, dim sum, curry. She chose to eat a ladybug over the very yummy macaroni and cheese casserole that I made her for lunch the other day. I'm trying not to think of what that means about my cooking. She is obsessed with her new Charley Harper puzzle and yesterday spent four hours straight taking each one out and fitting it back in. The temper tantrum that ensued when she had to stop for dinner was not pretty. Needless to say she didn't eat any dinner and instead worked on her puzzle, then collapsed in an exhausted heap. She is also quite obsessive about writing. She likes to draw, with pencils and crayons and chalk, but when it comes to writing, she MUST use a pen. I didn't know that at 21 months there would be a difference between drawing and writing, but there is. Her drawings are bright, full of squiggles and swirls and are added to all day long. The sheets of paper migrate from the floor to the table to her desk to my desk. Her writing however, is very intense - small dark markings, deliberate strokes, all in black pen. She lies on the floor, hunched over her paper, her face almost touching it and she fills the page with markings for at least half an hour. This was on my desk this morning.
Despite her intensity when it comes to certain things, she is such a lovely, funny, sweet little girl who steals my heart each and every day. And with her increasing independency, life is getting a little easier. There are more moments in the day. I can be more deliberate in how I spend my time. And with the onset of cooler weather, the desire to sit with hot tea and some knitting has been creeping into my heart. I even made an appearance on ravelry for the first time in a very long time, added far too many projects to my 'must knit' list {as always} and after seeing this {so beautiful!}, I thought that maybe I should start by making my idea of the perfect cardigan. Sheer. Black. 3/4 length sleeves. For layering with. And for cuddling in. I discovered this amazing project. Became inspired. Ordered a kusha-kusha scarf kit to satisfy the craving of working with Habu again. I also decided to take a leap into the unknown and go ahead with something that is just as exciting as it is nerve-wracking to me. But if it works, it will allow me to stay at home with Ella and surround myself with all the things I love. To distract myself from thinking about it, I booked a trip to New York to celebrate our birthdays at the end of this month. So yes. These moments have been productive, inspiring and sometimes creative...catching my breath, being deliberate and watching this girl grow. So wonderful.
